haggling for falafels and finding comfort

I was in a somewhat homesickish, estranged kind of mood this morning as I was walking down the streets of Bethlehem, on my way to catch a bus to Jerusalem to make my way to Tel Aviv. 
The maze of stone streets, hidden shops and boys wildly wheeling carts stacked to the sky didn't draw me in, but left me as cold as the unexpected chill that I awoke to. Bethlehem is Palestine territory and hence my good old friend the haggle was back in town... and I just couldn't really be bothered. The thought of haggling for a falafel which probably costs less than the paper that the money is printed on felt tiring and kind of awkward. Like irregular angles that jut out in inconvenient places. So even though I desired a hot drink and some comfort food, I kept my nose down and made it clear I wasn't buying anything. 

Then I had an epiphany.

I'm just a spectator.

Not the most insightful epiphany for sure, but for me at the time it felt significant. I don't really know what changed but suddenly I wanted to be IN the game. So I stopped to get a falafel sandwich  and gave a half-hearted haggle. He threw in a small sweet (probably because he felt sorry for how bad my haggling skills were). Then a man came up to me to offer me a coffee. I said yes and he scuttled off to his shop and came back with a hot cup of coffee to warm my both my hands and heart.(again with a pretty lame excuse for haggling... I mean it's 3 shekels! How do you haggle that?? But you KNOW they're ripping you off so you have to try something).
Suddenly my day had changed. 
Instead of just wishing to be at the bus stop already I felt a warmth within and a smile emerge upon my face. Being afraid of being tricked meant I was actually missing out on a really heart warming experience. It wouldn't surprise me if I was missing out on a number of things – in everyday life I mean – from  fear of being deceived or played. Somehow I tell myself (probably not even consciously) that by avoiding something that makes me feel foolish or unjustly treated, I win.
But I wonder if sometimes the fool is the winner here. The one that jumps ahead first and finds that he comes out the other side with a new experience and new way of seeing things. It may not always seem good, true. But I think I cut myself short by staying where it's comfortable. Adding to that, I think that if I was to really look truthfully at myself I would find that perhaps I'm not as 'comfortable' as I make out to be. By avoiding discomfort I actually find myself in that very state. But by diving head first into what initially seems uncomfortable and unknown, I find that a new type of comfort is mine. Not night-under-a-warm-blanket-under-a-roof comfort, (which I must say I do love at the right time) but the comfort of a busy seemingly chaotic street where you know where everything is and how everything works and the people that occupy it. 
A sense of home maybe. 
That's what I found today anyway.

The Palestinians are a heart-warming bunch. Sure they still rip you off with everything you buy, but there is far greater sense of welcome in the air. Often they will come out of their way just to shake your hand, ask you where you are from and say "welcome!" then off they go to their ordinary lives. No hanging on, no "come and look in my shop for free" magical offers. (Incidentally, by 'no' I mean not nearly as many as in Egypt)  – just an appreciation to you for coming to visit their land. 
They laugh and mess around as though they have no worries in the world.
I don't know  if I could say the same of myself if I was in their shoes.
A lot of them can't move past the Israeli border. 
To have your physical freedom denied is something I haven't known and don't particularly wish to know.  But to me it shows that physical freedom does not in itself lead to satisfaction and happiness. Of course I could never know their full story and how they actually feel, but the genuineness of their welcome and the warmth that I feel from them makes me wonder about what it is that actually does bring fulfilment in life.
If I'm to go by what has made me tick so far, I'd say it would be two things, actually make that three: 
- Doing something new and challenging that I didn't think I could do.  
- Finding a genuine connection with another human. One of those I'm-really-enjoying-your-company-and-I-can-tell-you're-enjoying-mine! connections. 
- Funnily enough, the third would actually be comfort. 
That feeling of being at home and being in your right place. (I hesitated on this last one simply because it's the one I've rarely felt on this trip)
I don't know if that's what the Palestinians think, but it is what this travelling humbug thinks. 
And I have a pretty strong inclination to believe it will ring true wherever in the world I find myself.